IBM creates computer that thinks like a cat
Wants to go outside even though it's just been outside
The greatest technical minds at IBM have not been spending their time productively - they have instead been wasting shareholder's funds creating a realistic simulation of a cat's brain. At least the time wasted will perhaps spawn a viral internet meme that may amuse some teenagers for a few seconds.
The boffins claim to have accurately simulated a cat's cerebral cortex, or the "thinking" part of the brain, resulting in a computer that monitors the world a bit like a cat monitors the world.
The IBM cat brain is made up of 147,456 processors and 144 terabytes of memory, and thanks to 'Moore's Law', the makers theorise it'll be possible to simulate a human brain within the next decade.
A PHOTO OF A CAT: Here is a photo of a cat. Is this funny, internet? Is it? Is it? [Image credit:
]
The IBM cat computer currently wants to go outside, even though it has just been outside.
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If you liked it then you should have put a cat on it
If the above news story has made you very happy and excited because it mentions cats and you LOVE CATS, there is, inevitably, an iPhone app for that problem of yours - CatPaint. It empowers the user to drop cats onto photographs, so the resulting funny creation may be forwarded to friends.
CAT APP: Bringing low-brow humour to a social network near you
The friends will then think you are funny, and will invite you around for tea more often. Who would have though that in the year 2009, mankind could be brought together through a simple, common, yet sadly mistaken belief that cat photographs are amusing?
Down under going up over
New Zealand will soon have the ability to launch two bags of sugar into space, thanks to the efforts of Rocket Lab Ltd. The private company's Atea-1 suborbital rocket successfully test-fired an engine on the ground this week, although the skinny launcher it'll power into space can only manage a two kilo payload. The private organisation is partially funded through selling t-shirts on the internet, like all sound modern businesses.
100% COTTON: Cotton was invented by NASA to keep Apollo astronauts warm on the Moon
Pity the poor Brazilian technology fan. Sony has now decided to launch the PlayStation2 - yes, TWO - in Brazil this month, the same month the console celebrates the 9th anniversary of its original Japanese launch in the year 2000. For an astonishingly huge price of $465, Brazilian gamers may now officially enjoy what us spoilt lot have been picking up from car boot sales for £30 with 20 games for the last five years.
LUCKY THEM: They're getting the Gizmondo in Q1 2010 [Image credit: Gizmodo Brazil]
And while we moan about having to wait a few days for new firmware updates or something equally embarrassingly petty, the poor South American gamers have to import their PS3s and Xboxes from eBay - thanks to Brazil's monstrous sales taxes and stingy $50 import limit.